These winter months I have found myself incredibly reflective and grateful for a practice, project, and lifestyle which I have been blessed to call my own for seven years. Drawing Thanks has become so much more than I ever could have imagined when I began my first sketchbook on January 1st, 2018. Through this work, I have found myself, I have found my community, and I have found my future. As I gear up for a very exciting 2025 with the Maple Ridge Artist Residency, I wanted to share seven of the most important lessons I have learned through this practice, project, and lifestyle and encourage others to be brave, get creative and embrace themselves fully.
We find the best versions of ourselves when we hold space for others. If not for safe gatherings like Save On Meat’s Late Night Snack Drag Series (shoutout to Patricia Emme, Continental Breakfast, and Ash MacLeod) and Plenty of Plates, Queer Cabaret at Bimini’s in Kits (shoutout to Alison Ward), CreativeMornings/Vancouver at SFU Woodwards and so many others like them, I wouldn’t have met many of the folks who I call friends and who have made me feel safe to live freely and authentically as myself. Serving and supporting creative community makes me feel like me. I spent many years before Drawing Thanks putting on masks to accommodate what I thought those around me wanted me to be. None of them ever fit all that well and it’s not easy to live in that constant discomfort. I found myself through the hundreds and hundreds of perspectives I had the privilege of exposure to. As people shared their many stories with me, I could finally see my own taking shape… and there was room for it at the table still.
If you believe in yourself, others will believe in you too. I have dealt with confidence issues most of my life. I have never felt quite at home in my own body. More often than not it has felt more like a rental vessel that doesn’t represent my style or character, not something I can look at and identify with—it is simply the one I got. I am also quite quiet and observational in nature until I am in a place of comfort with the company I keep. For many years, I surrounded myself with folks who I thought could train me and reprogram me to be socially outgoing, vocally extroverted, and to exemplify “strong male leadership” (and then the comfort in my own skin would come, I guess?). That was never me and was never going to be me though. Once I leaned into who I am: my softness, my curiosity, my desire to develop informed opinions and perspectives, my capacity for compassion and empathy AND I started expressing myself more authentically visually, a lot of things changed for me. I found the love of my life, began my dream job, landed a three year art residency, and I have a community of support behind me. I am still VERY MUCH in the process of finding my visual identity and taking ownership of this rental vessel, but it is no longer a scary thing to make those choices anymore. I am more supported now than I ever have been because I know who I am and own it.
The people with the least are the first to share. Though I was very fortunate that Rick Hansen showed interest in my project early on and opened many, many doors for my interviews and connections in the future, I have found over time that, generally, those with the most resources are the slowest to part with them for your cause. I have had countless incredible interactions with other creatives over my time with Drawing Thanks by participating in skills-exchanges. I am so grateful for those moments when two parties recognized that they didn’t have much to spare financially, but that there was more than enough creativity and honed skill to get the job done for two. I have also found that those with fewer worldy possessions are the most generous in sharing their stories and their time—which from my perspective, are the most valuable offerings one can present. If you don’t know any of the unhoused folks in your neighbourhood, I implore you to step out and make a friend living a different life than yours. There is so much to be learned from different perspectives and lived experiences.
Time is our most valuable commodity. Seven years of Drawing Thanks have flown by. In that time I have wanted to do a podcast but did not, I have half-completed several books (which will see the light of day at some point), I have sat on the URL “drawingthanks.com” for most of those 7 years though only launching the website last September, I have been on and off social media—and that is all because we only have so much time in a day. For me, the most important part of my practice will always be making deep connections and helping another human feel seen and appreciated for how they show up. The portraits must go on! Often, that means I don’t get to spend as much time as I would like sharing posts online and elaborating on the context behind the portraits. I stopped counting portraits after 3000, but it only takes a second of thought to recognize that the portrait to post ratio is way off. That is something I have come to accept and at this point, I can only do my best. Maybe in another seven years, Drawing Thanks won’t be a one person show. I have always wanted to expand, but have exercised reluctance due to the fact that I haven’t had the financial foundation or actionable business plan to monetize the project. I am not exactly sprinting to that goal post these days as I find the alternative economies of perspective, gratitude, and creativity I am exploring to be far more valuable and more “my lane.”
Seeing, accepting, embracing, and celebrating another human is the most powerful gift you can give. It doesn’t exactly take an art practice for me to recognize that, but it sure provides an emphasis. I can know I am loved and seen when someone uses my correct pronouns. That feeling is elating. I want to make others feel that way. I do find so much satisfaction and joy seeing positive reactions to my very personal artwork. Many of my best friendships began with that moment of recognition. I also often find myself supporting those in my network with memorial portraits of loved ones lost. That can be a lot for me to wrap my head around when I think about it—those special portraits represent the memory and recognition of a special person for so many. I hold that responsibility and honour very close to my chest. I also cherish the moments in which people reach out to celebrate friends or family through a birthday portrait. Over the years, I have been blessed to see, accept, embrace and celebrate so many wonderful folks from different backgrounds. That action is NEVER a one way exchange. I guarantee the company you “see'“ and learn to understand will gift you right back with perspective and lived-experience that will make you go “aha” and move forward in life quite (positively) differently.
Who you surround yourself with influences who you are as a person. When I think back to the days of my teens and twenties and all the times I put on a mask to fit in with a crowd, I recognize that when I donned that mask I was typically in a crowd that didn’t make me feel safe to be me. Not only did I compartmentalize and falsely project a self that wasn’t me, I also picked up on some bad habits and behaviours these “friends” exhibited to fit in. Drawing Thanks changed my life in every sense of the phrase. As I began to seek out positive community role models, look to see life through the many perspectives I encountered, and explore the communities in which a little bit more of me could come out with each visit, I was becoming a much more whole me. I was finding space and acceptance for my moral compass, curiosities, desires, and self-representation which I had never had before. Not only were these aspects of me allowed to exist, but they were now able to THRIVE. These days, I strive to continue to let these parts of me grow as I am continually exposed to just how many different ways there are to live life.
It’s not about the money; There is always another economy in play. I have been very blessed in that, over time, I have been able to recognize the significant role Drawing Thanks is playing in perspective, gratitude, and creativity exchange. I am constantly in a process of both receiving and giving in these economies. These are all things that I, admittedly, do value over money. With Drawing Thanks, I am the richest human. I am privileged to a continuous process of learning and discovery. Money comes and goes, but memories, ideas, perspectives, connections, and love stick around for good. If there is a single piece of advice I could share with an emerging artist, it is to find the alternative economy THEY can activate and let it enrich their life to the fullest.
If you have gotten this far, I deeply appreciate you for inviting me into your life and sharing the oh-so-precious gift we all hold that is time. If you have anyone in your life that you feel could connect, discover part of themselves, or feel inspired to pick up a sketchbook from the words I have written, please feel encouraged to share this article and actively participate in the perspective, gratitude, and creativity economies with me.
After these 7 years of Drawing Thanks, I am grateful for you.
This blog post was created with love and gratitude on the unceeded territories of the Katzie First Nation and Kwantlen First Nation.